Saturday, June 20, 2015

Primal Sexual Energy

Sexual attraction is not a choice - it's a hard-wired response to psychological triggers.  Put simply, if you dress in a distinctly masculine way, and act in a distinctly masculine way, you will express a primal sexual energy that is naturally attractive to women. And vice-versa. 
I recently came across an example of masculine sexual energy from a very unlikely source… a woman... Australian actress and model Ruby Rose.  She has been grabbing headlines in America since her debut as an inmate on the television series "Orange Is The New Black".
In interviews Ruby often describes herself as being 'gender fluid'... moving between the sexual identity of both male and female.  And as an example, in a recent video she transforms herself from a blonde wearing a tight dress, red lipstick and high heels, into a confident and potentially dangerous 'Bad Boy'.  She even wears a prosthetic penis to create that all-important masculine bulge in her pants.  Her video is called “Break Free."
But what’s interesting is that, because she wants to be attractive to women, Ruby instinctively adopts a masculine image and sexual energy. And her ability to express that has caused a growing number of straight women across America to become instant fans.
And therein lies the lesson.  Towards the end of the video Ruby emerges with an edgy hair-cut, wearing a dark coloured jacket, fitted jeans, shiny leather boots, and expressing masculine body language that says “I’m in chargeI know what I’m doing - and I know what will excite you.
And that primal masculine energy registers with straight women and feminine-gay women alike!
So the question is, how can you tweak your own Image Projection to create the kind of sexual attraction that’s causing so many straight women to look at Ruby and say “I’d tap that.”
Keep in mind that increasing your attraction-factor is not something that's done by being extra nice.  It’s done by being extra manly…. creating a strong and slightly aggressive (edgy) look that triggers a primal sexual excitement in women. 
And the good news is that you don't have to act like this all the time... just now and then will probably be enough to increase the sexual tension in your relationship.
It's not something that's necessary all the time because even though Bad Boys and Bad Girls are exciting ( and very sexual ), they generally don't want to settle down with just one person.  And one way or another, most people realise that.  So just a touch of Bad Boy is usually more than enough. 
Below is the link... you can watch the whole thing... or just the last 40 seconds. It really is a lesson in primal sexual energy : *(5mins17secs – or start at 4mins42secs) 
It's a Primal Thing.

Tuesday, June 9, 2015

Express your Cultural Heritage - Alpha Style

One of the things I like about Jackie Chan’s fashion sense is that it’s obviously ‘Alpha’, but at the same time he also expresses his own cultural heritage. In fact his unusual blend of cultural styles often reminds me of the Sino-European fashion that was made famous in Shanghai in the 1930’s.
To express your own cultural heritage all you have to do is start with one or two fashion pieces. For example, you might focus on a particular style of jacket, or a shirt collar, or a pattern that has some cultural significance
This can work for any culture... Australian, German, Russian, Malaysian, Chinese... any culture
All you need to do is apply the following Alpha Style guidelines :
  • take a minimalist approach (little-to-no decoration)
  • highlight your best physical features (shoulders, chest, butt)
  • use dark and solid colours as the foundation of your wardrobe
  • make sure that everything you wear is simple, strong and functional
  • and when possible, buy quality items that fit well and are well made (elegant). 

As a cultural contrast to Jackie's expression, above is a casual example of Austrian Alpha Styling

Blue jeans ; strong stylish boots ; knitwear that features rural colours together with some blue to complement the jeans ; and a green wool jacket that's a contemporary expression of the traditional Austrian Loden jacket. 

It might not look very impressive to anyone who isn't Austrian, but to the locals it would demonstrate a young man's masculinity, and his cultural pride.  And that can prompt greater respect from other men, and maximise his attraction-factor amongst the local girls.

Here's another example.  It's a modern version of the iconic Australian Driza-Bone oilskin jacket. Wear it with a good quality chambray shirt, a pair of fitted jeans or chinos, and a pair of RM Williams boots (below), and you've got an urban expression of Australia's cultural heritage.

It's all about image projection. Using your heritage to make a statement about your character!
It's a Primal Thing.  

Saturday, June 6, 2015

Maximise your Exposure

Most single men think they have to go to a bar or a club to meet eligible women.  But that's often not the case at all.  Most men miss everyday opportunities to maximise their exposure and start-up conversations with women who like the way they look.  It could be at work, at a coffee shop, at social or religious events, or even at the supermarket.

So you should never go grocery shopping wearing a daggy old t-shirt, baggy shorts and flip-flops!  

Instead, wherever you go, on a weeknight or the weekend, always strive to wear an outfit that has high sexual currency.  Because you never know when you're going to run into someone you find attractive, or who might find you attractive.

Keep in mind that we (humans) are naturally hard-wired to judge someone from a distance. It's a primal survival trait.... we have to quickly determine if a stranger is a friend, or foe.  And it's for that reason that you should give yourself the advantage of dressing in a way that maximises your natural masculinity. 

Remember that sexual attraction is not a choice... it's a hard-wired response to primal triggers.

So if you're likely to come across women at your workplace, or at the companies you visit, then focus your Alpha Styling on how you dress for work. How do you do that?  Simple :
  • take a minimalist approach (with little-to-no decoration)
  • highlight your best masculine features (shoulders, chest, butt)
  • use dark and solid colours as the foundation of the way you dress.

When you're shopping for groceries at your local supermarket, dress in a casual expression of Alpha Styling.  Because if you attract someone's attention, it's easy to then make eye contact, and smile as you pass by. 

And if they're interested in what they see, you're probably going to run into them again in the next aisle where you can smile again, and say "Hi." 

Don't be in a rush though... and never seem too eager to make contact.  If a woman is interested, then no doubt you'll bump into each other again in a few minutes.

And it's at that stage you will have the opportunity to take the interaction a little further... perhaps with a short complement about her appearance.  For example, "Great shoes! - or jeans! - or hair!"

Just keep in mind that when you do start talking, that first 60 seconds of conversation is going to be important. So make sure you've got your back story ready.

What's a back story?  It's a description of yourself that you give when they ask "What do you do?"  And your response has to be something that makes you seem interesting and different.  

Here's a link to the post on that tactic.  Just click on it if you'd like to find out more :


It's a Primal Thing. 


Saturday, May 23, 2015

Why Celebrities follow the Average Guy

I’m always amused when I see a photo of a celebrity who’s dressed like an average guy, and standing next to a luxury car.  Because you can bet that he doesn’t actually see himself as an average guy.  In this case it's Mr. Justin Bieber… an international celebrity… a VIP.

However his preference for 'street' fashion is easily explained from a psychological perspective!

The way we all dress is influenced by 3 primal values… and it doesn’t matter if you’re a celebrity or not… these values are hard-wired into our psyche :
  1. to fit in and be accepted by our social group (tribe)
  2. to be different and raise our status amongst that group
  3. to be sexually attractive to potential mates within the group.

So when we look at Mr. Bieber we see a young man who is trying very hard to look like other guys his age, and no doubt like the guys he socialises with. That's value #1.

He has ink (tattoos), and he seems to prefer baggy-crotch pants, and wearing them so low they look like they might fall down. But again that’s value #1… an attempt to give him street-cred... which is good for his career.

Now we come to his expensive car(s).  This definitely sets him apart from the average guy, and makes him very desirable as a potential mate.  That’s an expression of values #2 and #3.

However the average guy doesn’t realise that celebrities are actually following what’s being worn on the streets… simply because, like everyone else, celebrities want to fit in and be accepted too. 

So next time you’re thinking about following what some rich celebrity wears, keep in mind that he’s most probably being influenced by what the average guy on the street is wearing.

And unless you’ve got the money and fame that he has, copying what he wears is only going to make you look average, and insecure about who you are. And neither of those are a turn-on for  most ladies.

You’re much better off wearing a style of dress that makes a strong masculine statement wherever you go.  A style of dress makes a positive impression across all age-groups and cultures.  It's something that many celebrities have to pay a Personal Stylist to create for them :
  • take a minimalist approach (with little-to-no decoration)
  • highlight your best masculine features (shoulders, chest, butt, thighs)
  • and use dark and solid colours as the foundation of your wardrobe.

It’s a Primal Thing.


Wednesday, May 20, 2015

It's just My Way of Controlling the Future

Most people like to be in control of what's happening around them… because if you’re in control you’re more likely to get whatever you personally want from a situation. So it should come as no surprise that girlfriends like to be able to control their boyfriend - but without him realising it of course.

Recently I watched an episode of the television comedy Last Man Standing… and the last scene offered a funny insight into The Primal Game between men and women :

Scene :  A girlfriend decides to improve her boyfriend’s style of dressing to increase his desirability.  But then she realises that if she changes his look, he might become attractive to other women... and then he might realise that he could have his choice of girls. 

So she decides to keep him looking dorky, and feeling grateful to have her as his girlfriend.

Her decision is all about retaining control… a psychological tactic that's used by some women to make sure the guy sticks around long enough to be a protector-provider for her, and for their future children.  It's a long-term plan... much longer than most men realise when they're just dating!

A lot of guys think that if they’ve already got a girlfriend (or a wife) then the way they dress is just fine... because it was good enough to get her.  But what they don’t realise is that many women choose a man they can mould and shape… and that includes the way he dresses.

In short, they have a plan for their man. It's a primal thing. They're planning their own family!

What has to be understood however, is that the more 'Alpha' a man looks, the more it increases the status of his lady amongst the other women in her social group. Why?  Because it shows that she is good enough to attract-and-keep a strong and confident man... an Alpha male

So really it’s a win-win situation when you take charge of the way you dress, and maximise your natural masculinity with your own expression of Alpha Styling.  It will make you more attractive to your partner... and it will prompt greater respect from other men. 

But keep in mind that you might come across some resistance if your partner starts to feel insecure about the extra attention you start to attract from other women.  And if that happens, then she will need some re-assurance from you… until she realises that you’re not actually going anywhere.

For a funny example look up Last Man Standing, Season 3 Episode 10,
and skip forward to the last scene in the cafe.

Tuesday, April 28, 2015

Quick Question for Guys?

Women instinctively know how to maximise their attraction-factorDifferent cultures achieve it in different ways, but in the West the most common way is to wear a little black dress and high heels.

This all stems from the three primal values that influence how we (men and women) dress :
  1. to fit-in and be accepted by our social group
  2. to stand out and raise our status within the group
  3. to be sexually attractive to potential mates within the group.
Men are more inclined to be influenced by values #1 and #2… while women are more inclined to focus on values #2 and #3... standing out and maximising their social status and sexual attraction.

But when a single guy is looking for a potential girlfriend, he really needs to pay more attention to maximising HIS status and sexual attraction. It's a primal thing. We (humans) have a natural desire to attract as many potential mates as possible, then choose the right one for us.

So my question is this, "As a man, what's your version of the little black dress and high-heels?" 

Or put another way, "What outfit do you wear to maximise your sexual currency as a man?"

It might surprise you to know that most guys don't actually have an outfit that has high sexual currency.  Instead they just wear what's trendy... or what the other men in their social group wear... or what they think looks good (in spite of never having ask women for their opinion).

What every man needs to do is wear what women think looks good.  And you can achieve that by :
  • taking a minimalist approach (with little-to-no decoration)
  • highlighting your best masculine features (shoulders, chest, butt, thighs)
  • using dark and solid colours as the foundation of your wardrobe (see below).

Finally, I recommend that men who are married or in a relationship also give some thought to this question.  Having a partner is no reason to be lazy and let your attraction-factor slip. But surprisingly, that's exactly what a lot of guys do. 

Remember that sexual attraction is not a choice... it's a hard-wired psychological response. And what you need to do is wear clothing that triggers that response.

So if you want your partner to continue finding you to be sexually attractive, then you need to pay attention to what you wear when you're with her.

So once again -  What's your version of a little black dress and high-heels?  If you don't have an immediate answer, then it's time to start thinking about it.

It's a Primal Thing.

Friday, April 17, 2015

Conversation Starters and a Back-Story

Everyone who dresses with their own expression of Alpha Styling knows that it works. It's a primal thing.  It maximises your attraction-factor, and prompts greater respect from other men.

How does it work?  Well it expresses (through your choice of clothing) the basic character traits that are desirable in a male. These are the character traits of the primal warrior-hunter :
  • a man whose approach practical *(simple)
  • a man who is capable in his role *(strong) 
  • a man who is effective in his role *(functional)

That gives you a way of dressing that's simple, strong, and functional. And then you add the two traits that distinguish an Alpha male :
  • obvious quality
  • and an understated elegance. 

All that comes together into five parameters that determine everything you buy... from your watch and sunglasses, to your shirts, pants, jackets and shoes.  All of them make the same statement :

Simple, strong and functional, with an obvious quality, and understated elegance.

But sometimes... just sometimes... when you're on a date or at a social event, there are one or two other men who just happen to get it right and are looking quite 'Alpha' themselves.

So how are you going to distinguish yourself from them?  How are you going to be more interesting and attractive?

Well it all comes down to two tactics : a conversation starter ; and an interesting back-story.

Just recently I was talking to a Branding & Marketing executive about the current trend of wearing skulls (death mythology).  As an example, in the top photo Arnold Schwarzenegger is wearing a large skull ring... as does Sylvester Stallone (above).

Now it takes a larger than life personality to wear a ring of that size, but anyone could wear a black leather bracelet like the one below.  It's primal and edgy because it's leather and metal... and it's attractive enough for people to notice it on your wrist.  And skulls are very on-trend right now!

This is what I call a conversation starter, because it gives someone who is interested in you something to comment on... something to start a conversation about.
Keep in mind that it's difficult for most women to start talking to a man they're interested in, so you want to make it as easy as possible for them to engage in a conversation with you. Then you can decide if they are right for you, or not.
So what you're going to hear is something like "That's unusual - does that mean something special?"
And here is where your back-story comes in to play.  After that comment you have about sixty seconds to sell yourself with an interesting story about what that piece means to you. And it should be description that has the potential to set you apart from all the other men in the room.
So what you have to do is put together all the interesting facts about your life and/or the activities that interest you... and link them to an attractive conversation starter.
For example, you might work in an interesting or unusual field... or you might like to scuba-dive, or rock-climb, or ride motor cycles.  Remember you've got about 60 seconds to highlight the aspects of your life that make you different and interesting.
But they must be aspects that are attractive to women... aspects that complement the primal role of a man being a strong protector-provider... a modern-day warrior-hunter.     
The bracelet above is another example of a conversation starter. It's a solid leather bracelet with a Cross as it's feature piece. It's something I recommended to a man whose main contact with eligible women was at the social events at his Church.  It's primal and edgy, but it also highlights his beliefs.

And because that same gentleman is also a martial artist, I recommended that he consider wearing something like this Japanese kanji, on a strong black leather necklace.
It's the symbol for Faith/Belief... so it connects his interest in reality-based personal protection with his Christian faith... and that gives more content and texture to his personal back-story.
You can imagine what those two pieces together (bracelet and necklace) will do to complement his personal Alpha Styling at any social event. He will look masculine and stylish, with a primal edginess. And that's a look that is very attractive to most women.
Remember, sexual attraction is not a choice... it's a hard-wired psychological response. And what you're looking to do is trigger that response with what you wear, and what you say.
And this isn't just for single guys either. Any man who is married or in a relationship should look at strengthening his partner's attraction by adopting these simple tactics.  Bring out your inner ALPHA.

It's a Primal Thing.

Tuesday, March 3, 2015

The Primal Game and Image Projection

Photo from 'The Last African Warriors' by Gianni Giansanti
When I first came across this photo of a Mursi warrior I looked at it through the 3 Primal Values that influence the way we dress :
  1. to fit in and be accepted by our social group (tribe)
  2. to be different and raise our status amongst that group
  3. to be sexually attractive to potential mates within the group.
From that perspective I saw was that :
  • he’s wearing Mursi facial decoration in order to be accepted
  • but to raise his status he’s wearing the tusk of a dangerous animal 
  • and no doubt that’s a very hot look amongst the young women of his tribe.

I’m sure you’ll agree that it’s a very striking photo… but that particular look just wouldn’t have the same affect in our everyday life. 

So my question to you is this... how would you describe the way you dress at work, or socially?  Just finish the following statements to get a clearer understanding on how you're presently expressing the 3 Primal Values, either at work or in your relationship :
  1. I fit-in to my particular group by wearing ............
  2. I strive to be different and raise my status by ….........
  3. and to be sexually attractive to potential mates (or my partner) I ............

The answers can be enlightening, and highlight
how you might easily lift your game!

It’s a Primal Thing.

Friday, February 13, 2015

The Japanese Art of Attaining 'Cool'

The term ‘cool’ stems from describing individuals who are ‘cold as ice’ when they deal with a confrontation. In short, nothing seems to phase them!
You can see that kind of 'cool' in movies today, expressed by Daniel Craig (James Bond), Liam Neeson (Taken), and of course Hiroyuki Sanada (above) from The Last Samurai.
The Japanese develop this state of mind (called Mushin) in their martial art practice… specifically in the ceremony they use to start-and-finish any kind of practice or free-sparring. 
The ceremony isn’t just about etiquette… it’s about mind-set training… it’s about developing the ability to quickly adopt a non-emotional state of mind in preparation for combat.
Why is that important? Because emotional extremes distort your sense of reality, and that affects your physical response. Common examples of this are : frozen with fear ; or blind with rage.
Here’s a brief explanation of the ceremony… because it’s something that many martial artists don’t fully understand.  First you walk to your starting position with whatever state of mind you happen to be in at the time :
  • you bow, and as you do you suppress your thoughts and emotions
  • as you rise and adopt your posture, you’re now in a Mushin state of mind… no thought… no emotion
  • then you move, free of any emotional extremes that might distort your sense of reality (fear, anger, self-doubt)
  • when you’re finished you adopt a Zanshin state of mind… like Mushin, aware of your surroundings, and ready to continue
  • finally you bow again… and as you rise you return to whatever emotional state is normal for you at the time… and you walk away.

This is a skill that has broad applications in everyday life. I’ve known of martial artists who have used it to quickly centre themselves and handle situations like a heart-attack in an office, and news of a death at a family gathering. 

When there is chaos all around you, you need to be able to adopt a Mushin state in order to survive, or to help others survive. 

But the reason I'm bringing him to your attention is because Japanese sword training offers some of the best examples of Alpha body language.

What is Alpha body language?  Well it's the way an Alpha personality carries themselves... and it's all an expression of their attitude to life.

What's their attitude to life?  Well for a start, an Alpha personality (male or female) has a strong sense of who they are, and where they're going.  They understand the game - or at least the game going on around them - and that knowledge gives them a calm and aware state of mind.

Consequently, they walk with a relaxed balance - never tense. Their shoulders are rolled back in a way that expresses a gentle understated pride in who they are.  They exude self-control and a calm focus... but they're ready to take action in an instant.

This is why I often recommend that executives and close protection operators undertake some form of Japanese swordcraft... even if it's just for a short time.  In fact it's something that can  benefit everyone, and here's why..... 
The way the techniques are practiced make you repeatedly express an Alpha attitude to life.  And that experience strengthens your ability to carry yourself in a relaxed and balanced manner.... which is going to have a subtle but profound effect on everyone you come in contact with. 
Why?  Because it's the body language of an Alpha personality, and that will register with people at an unconscious level.

To watch a clip from 'The Last Samurai' that highlights what a cool Mushin state looks like and moves like, click on this link.  Both exponents express it, so you can enjoy watching it twice :


It's a Primal Thing.

Thursday, February 5, 2015

What Bodyguards, VIP's and Celebrities have in Common


'Image Projection' is a term used by close protection bodyguards to describe the tactic of dressing in a way that looks professional, strong, and capable.

And that's just as important for VIP's, sports stars, celebrities and corporate executives

In fact whenever I'm guiding someone on how to strengthen their business image and prompt greater respect from people, I give them the same advice I'd give to a professional bodyguard :

" Always look like you're worth more than the client is paying you! "

That basically means dressing Alpha Style... and it's something you'll see actors and celebrities doing for any event that's going to be televised. They make sure they dress in a way that looks :
  • simple
  • strong
  • and functional
  • with an obvious quality
  • and an understated elegance
Below are just a few examples, and following that is a link to a bodyguard blog that offers more insights into Suiting Up for the Job. And as I've already highlighted, the same principles apply for corporate executives... regardless of whether you have to wear a tie at work every day, or not. 

It's the fit, and the fabric, and the accessories that will make the difference.....

Watch : a strong looking quality timepiece with either a metal or leather band. 

Shoes : preferably a strong 'chisel' toe, and an extended stitched sole. 

Folder : a quality zip-up leather folder... and a strong looking business pen.

Bags : And if possible, ensure that and any bags you use on business trips are also leather.

Now here's the link to the International Close Quarters Protection Operators Association blog :

It's a Primal Thing.

Monday, January 26, 2015

Interviews from all Walks of Life - Sean Genders

Introduction : The first in this series of interviews is with Sean Genders, an Emmy Award winning Special Effects Artist who recently spent seven months in Namibia, working on the latest Mad Max movie - 'Fury Road' - due for release in May this year.

Sean also wrote and directed an award winning short film called 'The Edge of Reality', which stars John Jarratt and Dan Wyllie. It has been a feature in the annual Australian Film Festival in Pezenas (France) for the past 3 years.

Sean presently lives on the Gold Coast (Australia) to be close to Warner Bros. Film Studios. He holds black belt ranking in martial arts, and gives classes in reality-based self-protection tactics... which served him well in Namibia. 

When Hollywood arrived to film Fury Road, the local towns became flooded with beggars and petty criminals who were looking for rich easy targets.  But we'll explore those street confrontations in a future interview (coming soon).


Sean, how would you describe your personal expression of Alpha Styling?

Firstly I think it's important to highlight that Alpha Styling has a subtle psychological effect on people everywhere.  It's understated, but it can have a definite effect on your career and social life.

For me, my working locations can change daily. I can go from a set in a film studio to a location in a city, or a jungle, or even the deserts of Namibia... so comfort and durability is essential.

Everywhere I go I take my leather bag with me. Along with whatever else I need on the day, it holds my watch... a pen... a folding multi-tool... a torch... small first-aid kit... wallet and passport.

Sean - because different countries and cities have different cultural influences, what styling advice would you give to men visiting or living on the Gold Coast?

Don't feel that you have to fit-in with everyone else all the time... especially if the men are wearing baggy board-shorts that women don't particularly like the look of... which is often the case.

There are great alternatives to just wearing long shorts, thongs and singlets. Block colours, fitted clothes and shorter shorts are always going to make you look more serious, and more attractive.

Just ask yourself "Would Bond wear it? James Bond is the quintessential Alpha personality... and that styling works internationally. Men respect it, and women are attracted to it.

So if you couldn't imagine James Bond wearing something, then it's obviously not masculine enough, and it isn't going to benefit your career or your social life.

Sean when it comes to accessories, what is your preference in sunglasses?

I like to have more than one pair. If you do a bit of research on-line, it can be a relatively inexpensive way to mix up your look while still retaining a personal style. I have a preference for the Persol brand.. specifically a metal frame that's not quite an aviator style, but very similar.

If I prefer to wear a thicker plastic frame then I never choose anything too large. I don't want to come off looking like Clark Kent (from Superman). The Persols in the photo above are a good example... and below are the metal frames I wear.

What's your preference in Watches?I like Omega... maybe its the Bond theme again. But I feel that a man needs more than one watch if he can pick up a couple of good quality pieces. I personally prefer something strong and metal for business... but I like the look of a stitched mahogany leather band for casual meetings and after-hours.

What about accessories like a business pen? :  I carry a Tuff Writer Precision Press tactical pen in burnt orange... but I plan to buy one of the titanium models... the dark edgy looking one (below).

I find Precision Press pens are stylish enough for business, and strong enough to be the perfect tool for self protection. I never travel without mine... and it passes through security without any trouble.

Any other 'tools' of self protection? : My small Varta Tactical Torch. In fact it's something I actually keep beside the bed when I'm at home. It's light, bright, very strong... and when it's held in your fist it makes an effective close-quarter striking tool.

Sean, is there a travel safety tip you can offer that's based on your personal experience?
When you're travelling, always be aware of the importance of maintaining a strong presence in your dress and how you carry yourself.  You need to appear aware and confident.
Never be over flashy in how you dress. As a Westerner you're already richer than most other nations, and the locals know that. They know that you'll have cash, an i-phone, camera, and maybe even a computer. And if you carry a bag, the criminals know that you will generally keep all those valuables in it.
So choose a bag wisely... something secure that you can wear close to your body. Mine actually has a strap that goes around my back to the opposite shoulder (like a holster).
Keep in mind that attacks are rarely random. So watch for the watchers... and watch them back. The lions don't attack the strongest gazelle. If you look like a hard target they will usually move on.
To see more of Sean's work you can visit his website by clicking on this link :
It's a Primal Thing.