Saturday, October 16, 2010

What's Alpha for Men, and What's Not

I think this photo is great... I laugh every time I see it. Why?  Because to me, the cowboy is smiling because someone just told him that some men wear shirts like this to go out on dates with women.... and he can't believe it.

Why is that funny?  Because a pale striped polo shirt on a man who is obviously an Alpha, just isn't right. In fact it's a contradiction in terms.  

Why?  Well it's just not strong enough for an Alpha. It's obviously a high quality shirt... but the best place for it is on the golf course... not on a date.

If the cowboy (or any Alpha male) was going to wear a polo shirt, it would most probably be in a solid colour like the one above. Why?  Because a solid colour is strong... and that feels natural and right to an Alpha personality.

Now here's an important point for men to understand - regardless of whether you're young or old, married or single.  As far as women are concerned, a striped polo shirt is not a primal attractor... it's going to do nothing to maximise your appeal. 

In fact the best response you're going to get from your partner is "Oh that's a nice colour on you darling."

But why would you settle for nice, when you could prompt a primal attraction by wearing a strong colour in a shirt that shows off some of your masculine features?

Now that's something that could put a twinkle in your partner's eye.

And as far as other men are concerned - they really don't care if you're wearing the latest fashion trend or not.  From a primal level, you either come across as being a strong character, or you don't. 

If you do, then they'll show you some respect.  If you don't, then you're obviously no threat to their social status, so there's no need to show you much respect at all.

And while we're on the subject of polo shirts, although big logos are fashionable, they can come across to many women as being a sign of over-compensation in a man : "Look at me - I'm trying to make a big impression by wearing a BIG logo." 

The guy in the photo above can get away with wearing a big Polo logo because he is a champion polo player (Nacho Figueras). He just happens to also do some modelling for Ralph Lauren.

So you see it's all about integrity and authenticity... being real.... and that's an attractive Alpha trait in both men and women.

So it all comes down to this. If something you wear is only "nice", then it probably isn't Alpha. But if it ticks the boxes of the following 5 parameters, then it is Alpha :

1)  simple 
2)  strong
3)  functional
4)  with an obvious quality
5)  and an understated elegance *(see photo above).

So how do these five parameters work? 

Well it all comes does down to attraction... and in the words of American dating guru David DeAngelo "Attraction is not a choice." 

In fact, attraction is a programmed response that's hard-wired into the human psyche.  So if you display the appropriate signals, you trigger a primal attraction.

What are the attraction signals for men?

They are character traits... a way of dressing that signals that this man is an Alpha male... someone who is practical - capable - effective in their role - has high standards - and an eye for detail.

These character traits then translate into a way of dressing that's : 

1)  simple (practical)

2)  strong (capable)

3)  functional (effective)

4)  has an obvious quality (high standards)

5)  and an understated elegance (an appreciation for subtle detail).

The photo below of Australian actor Hugh Jackman is a perfect example.

It's a Primal Thing.

1 comment:

  1. I always love your outfit posts! Love the men polos especially. Your post is good, very inspirational!